Blondes

> Blonde LOGIC
> 
> Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a
> bench
> talking ........ and one blonde says to the other,
> "Which do you think is farther away..........
> Florida
> or the moon?"
> 
> The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooo, can
> you
> see Florida...???"
> 
> 
> 
>  SPEEDING TICKET
> 
> A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and
> asks
> her very nicely if he could see her license.
> 
> She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get
> your
> act together. Just yesterday you take away my
> license
> and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
> 
> 
> 
>  RIVER WALK
> 
>  There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a
> river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.
> "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can
>  I get to the other side?"
> 
>  The second blonde looks up the river then down the
> river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."
> 
> 
> 
>  AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE
>  A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's
> office and said that her body hurt wherever she
> touched it.
> 
>  "Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me"
> 
> The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left
> breast
> and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed
> in even more. She pushed her knee and screamed;
> likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed.
> Everywhere she ouched made her scream.
> 
> The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are
> you?
> 
>  "Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."
> 
>  "I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is
> broken."
> 
> 
> 
>  KNITTING
> 
> A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car
> on
> the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded
> to
> see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
> Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing
> lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his
> window,
> turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
> 
> "NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
> 
> 
> 
>  BLONDE ON THE SUN
> 
> A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking
> one
> day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
> The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
> 
> The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the
> first
> on the sun!"
> 
> The Russian and the American looked at each other
> and
> shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you
> idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.
> 
> To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you
> know. We're going
> at night!"
> 
> 
> 
> IN A VACUUM
> A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It
> was
> her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on
> Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a
> vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear
> it?"
> 
> She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or
> off?"
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
>  FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
> 
> A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had
> acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their
> names
> were. The blonde responded by saying that one was
> named Rolex and one was named Timex.
> 
> Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming
> dogs
> like that?"
> 
> "HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They're
> watch dogs!"

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